The trendy paleo diet has been around for a while now, and the individuals that are on it have seen great results. The diet can seem complex, but the crux of it is that you eat like a caveman (or woman). This means that you can eat any wild berries (not poisonous) or fruits, wild grasses, etc., but nothing that had to be cultivated, since farming and cultivation were not around yet. Also, paleo diets do not have any carbs, as breads and pastas were not around yet either. Water is the only drink allowed, as no other drink had been used during the paleolithic time period. Meats, of course, are the preferred choice for those on a paleo diet. The main animals during this time period include the cave lion (combination of a lion and tiger), the woolly rhinocerous, and of course the giant deer megalocerus.
The trouble with the paleo diet is that woolly rhinos are really hard to find. “We would love to have a woolly rhino on the menu,” says Berkshire owner James Barry. “But they are extremely hard to find, and very expensive. Plus, we don’t think we would sell enough of them to make it worth our while.” Barry says that they have lost business because of the paleo diet. “It’s not just the customers that have become paleo, it is because of their friends. They can’t meet at a place that doesn’t have a strict paleo menu, so we lose more than just the paleo customer. We lose their friends.”
Business at Udis, a bread company, has really taken a hit. “We can offer things that just have meat,” says Udis owner Tom Johnston. “But we definitely have the reputation for our bread, so we just don’t get the paleo crowd, which hurts.” Both local businesses say they have seen about a 10% decline in sales they can attribute directly to the paleo diet. “We don’t plan any immediate changes,” says Barry. “There is a chance that the cost of megalocerus could go down, but we aren’t being optimistic at this point.
The Stapletonion editor in chief takes the following stance: “The Stapletonion feels that any diet depriving one of beer and chocolate simply isn’t right. Our great, great, great, great, great… great grandparents sacrificed and ate paleo so we wouldn’t have to. Plus, those dudes didn’t live very long, and I know a lot of fat, old drunks.”]]>