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With every new school year comes increasing pressure for Stapleton school auction committees to raise more money and plan more exciting and profitable auctions than previous years. Last year Bill Roberts held their auction on St. Patrick’s Day at a downtown hotel where many parents chose to party it up and spend the night. Tracy McCoy, the new 2013 auction committee chair, was so worried that she wouldn’t be able to meet the school communities’ expectations, that she was forced to think outside of the box. [Read more…] about Bill Roberts Elementary Plans Destination Auction

It’s been two years since the divorce for Stapleton resident Kara Gregory, but the scars remain from a marriage that seemed to deteriorate so quickly. “The worst thing is, the signs were there from the beginning,” says Gregory. “I mean, I must have told him a million times, the big plates go in the front on the bottom rack, the small ones in the back. It’s not that hard.” [Read more…] about Two Years After Divorce, Stapleton Woman Still Shocked She Married Man who Loaded Dishwasher So Poorly

Bladium in Stapleton had long been known for having an indoor inline hockey arena, but just less than a year ago, all of that changed. “We decided to just focus on indoor soccer,” said Footium manager Tim Kesterson. “It has been much more profitable, and we don’t have to deal with all that equipment and the people skating around in here. Just much easier.” [Read more…] about Bladium Finally Changes Name to “Footium” After Ditching Inline Hockey Eight Months Ago

In a recent study done in partnership with Forrest City and the City of Denver, it has been predicted that the Central Park Recreation Center will eventually become very similar to a 24 Hour Fitness. “When we say that, we don’t mean in the sense that it will be open 24 hours,” said lead analyst Jay Carlson. “And certainly, it won’t have that many classes, or any employees that are going to call you and ask about your fitness goals. The similarity we are assuming will happen is the biggest thing which is that the Central Park Rec Center will simply become a place for people to socialize, flirt, and in general, meet people of the opposite sex.” [Read more…] about Study: Rec Center Only Five Years Away from Being Just Like 24 our Fitness

In another bold move, Forest City has purchased the rights to the DIA Mustang, nicknamed “Blucifer.” The “art” project has never been very popular with the Denver community, and most residents do not like the fact that the evil mustang is one of the first things to greet visitors when they come to Denver. “I think it is just an awful piece,” said Denver resident Kevin Clark. “Did they think it was new age, modern, or hip? How was this piece ever okayed?” Well, because of certain rules Denver has when it comes to these publicly funded art projects, the piece must stay up for at least five years before it is up for consideration to be removed. That five years has now passed, and more than likely, a petition will be made to have it removed. So, Forest City decided to step in. “People that want to get rid of this thing are crazy,” says Forest City President Phil Dargossi. “I am somewhat of an art snob, and I know good art. This is a great piece.” Dargossi said that before people had a chance to petition it out and destroy it, he thought he would get it in the hands of a community that really appreciates art. “Stapleton is absolutely an artsy community, and will love having this piece so close to the town center,” said Dargossi. Blucifer will replace the area that had been taken by the big Christmas tree near the fountains. “This is a very exciting move for Forest City,” said Forest City Spokesperson Janelle Ayers. “I mean great art is hard to find, but now, all you need to do is follow the glowing, freaky eyes.” Residents are meeting the new project with mixed reviews. “I didn’t like it 15 miles away from me,” said Laura Smyth. “Why would I like it 10 blocks from me? Resident Ken Lair disagrees. “The kids are really going to think this is cool,” said Lair. “And think of all the weird folk stories we will be able to scare our kids with. Stay out too late, and Blucifer will come and get you.” Blucifer is no longer a public art project and is owned by Forest City, and therefore not subject to removal by petition.]]>

Brian and Michelle Asbee have two children, Reece (2.5), and Madison (6 months). Since Michelle had their second child six months ago, they have faced several challenges. Getting two kids on a similar schedule, traveling with two kids, making sure Reece is getting the proper attention, and simply trying to get some sleep among other things. But perhaps the biggest challenge they have faced is figuring out a way to determine who is doing more work. [Read more…] about Stapleton Couple Hires Actuarial Scientist to Help “Keep Score”

Jeremy and Tessa Whiteman are typical Stapleton residents. They work hard and do everything they can to provide for their kids. Also like most Stapleton residents, they are extremely proud of their children. “We of course think our kids are beautiful, athletic, and extremely bright,” says Tessa. “At this point, the sky is the limit in regards to their potential.” [Read more…] about Stapleton Parents Disappointed in Child’s Winter Weight Gain

In a much anticipated announcement, Digstown has made public its plans to begin offering table etiquette classes for Stapleton pets.

 “We have continued to receive many requests for us to help Stapleton dogs and cats acquire better table manners, and we finally decided to offer classes in the evenings for small groups of pets and their owners,” said Tammy Jarvis manager of Digstown, Stapleton’s well known doggie day care facility. 

”I mean – I keep hearing people whining about how their dog jumped up on the table and scarfed down a handmade burrito or helped herself to Egg Nog or Christmas cookies.  We think these classes will be very popular,” Jarvis said. 

Dogs and cats will learn whether to start with a beverage or solid food and where to place paws on the table when not eating and interacting with family members – along with other training on appropriate requests for additional food and gestures.  Rue shown above is attending her first class.

 “I’m just thrilled to hear this news.  I took my Labrador Martin over to some friends for dinner and he didn’t know how to sit up straight or that he should have waited for the hostess to be seated before he started on his Kibbles n Bits Gormet Blend.  I was just horrified,” said Sue Lindsley local Stapleton resident.

 “This is great!  I’ve been working hard to socialize my dog to Stapleton standards, but there’s still a lot of pressure, not to mention looks from friends when my dog Kiki starts helping herself to my neighbors’ fresh pasta or fresh fruit without asking.  This class is really going to do wonders – not to mention my daughter Maddie keeps trying to get Kiki to stay seated for her tea parties. “

Jarvis mentioned that pricing for the new table manners classes will be posted on the Digstown website by early next week.]]>