{"id":6047,"date":"2015-11-18T22:48:53","date_gmt":"2015-11-19T05:48:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/?p=6047"},"modified":"2015-11-18T22:48:53","modified_gmt":"2015-11-19T05:48:53","slug":"hunting-comes-to-stapleton-greenway","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/?p=6047","title":{"rendered":"Hunting Comes to Stapleton Greenway"},"content":{"rendered":"

\t\t\t\t\"\"<\/a>Good news \u2014 Forest City has finally solved Stapleton\u2019s ongoing financial shortfall, and most residents will be overjoyed with the creative solution the Ohio-based developer has come up with: duck hunting blinds along Westerly and Sand creeks.\n\u201cOh, we couldn\u2019t be happier to be partnering with one of America\u2019s most respected organizations \u2014 the National Rifle Association,\u201d said Forest City President Phil Dargossi. \u201cWhat\u2019s more American than Stapleton? I\u2019d say, duck hunting in Stapleton, but it\u2019s not just limited to ducks \u2014 it\u2019s open season on those pesky Canadian Geese<\/a>, too.\u201d\n\nAccording to Dargossi, the NRA will build and operate 10 hunting blinds along the creeks and share revenue with the Stapleton MCA. \u201cHunting hours will be restricted, of course,\u201d Dargossi explains. \u201cThere will be no hunting during peak school commute hours. Parents can rest assured their children won\u2019t be picking buckshot out of their backsides.\u201d\nMost Stapleton residents who the Stapletonion was able to reach for comment were ecstatic.\n\u201cOh, good god, yes. I hate those damn geese and their poop all over the place. Kill em\u2019, kill em\u2019 all!\u201d said Betty Evans of South End, with a maniacal laugh. But others, while acknowledging the unrivaled opportunity to hunt duck and geese in a suburban environment, lamented the fact that deer and coyote were not included. \u201cWell, sure, the geese are nuisance, but so are coyotes \u2014 didn’t anyone think of that?\u201d asked Josh Hansen of Northfield. \u201cI mean, with geese it\u2019s just the poop everywhere but coyotes? Coyotes are killers; they take at least a Toy Poodle or a Pug every year.\u201d\nBut then there were the true skeptics like Jenn Lembeck of Eastbridge, \u201cWhat the f-, I mean, you\u2019re kidding, right? This is a prank call.\u201d We assured Mrs. Lembeck, we were not adolescent children trying to get a rise out her. \u201cWho thought this would be a good idea? We\u2019ve moving. Definitely, we\u2019re outta here!\u201d Mrs. Lembeck screamed as she hung up.\nRegardless of the mix of emotions over exactly what can and cannot be hunted, and whether it\u2019s really a good idea that duck hunting blinds dot the trails of Stapleton\u2019s Westerly and Sand creek greenways, the vast majority of residents agreed the revenue generated by Stapleton-zoned hunting licenses and shotgun rentals will be a boon for the community.\n\u201cThis is going to keep the coffers full,\u201d said Dargossi with a twinkle in his eye. \u201cNow we can deliver all those parks and pools everyone\u2019s so pissed off about \u2014 makes my life easier.\u201d]]>\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-6047","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-issue-117","7":"entry"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6047","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6047"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6047\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6047"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6047"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6047"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}