{"id":1477,"date":"2011-12-14T06:22:59","date_gmt":"2011-12-14T13:22:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/?p=1477"},"modified":"2011-12-14T06:22:59","modified_gmt":"2011-12-14T13:22:59","slug":"stapleton-elf-on-shelf-tells-wife-husband-is-cheating-on-her","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stapletonion.com\/?p=1477","title":{"rendered":"Stapleton Elf on Shelf Tells Wife Husband is Cheating on Her"},"content":{"rendered":"

\t\t\t\t\"\"<\/a>\nIn a bizarre turn of events, an elf on the shelf in Stapleton informed resident Cindy Patterson that her husband Robert had been cheating on her. The elf, Randy, had been spying on Robert, including listening to his phone calls, looking at text and emails, and even monitoring his online chats.\n\u201cI\u2019m obviously shocked and disappointed,\u201d said Cindy. \u201cBut now I know I can always trust Randy and can take full stock on how good he says the kids have been.\u201d Robert feels betrayed by Randy and says he still can\u2019t believe that Randy sold him out. \u201cI have been the one giving him snacks and treats for years,\u201d says Robert. \u201cI don\u2019t know what I could have done that made him betray me like this.\u201d\n\n\u201cI will say this, she can keep that stupid elf in the divorce,\u201d says Robert. \u201cI mean, has this ever happened to anyone else?\u201d Through very little research, the Stapletonion has found no circumstances of an elf on the shelf ever ending a marriage, or even discussing adult behavior, as their main purpose is to watch the kids. Randy suspects that there was more going on. \u201cI\u2019m not sure if she was giving him extra treats, or if they went shopping together, or maybe even more, if you know where I\u2019m going.\u201d\nCindy contends that Randy has never been anything more than a trusted confidant when it came to evaluating the behavior of her children. \u201cAnything that Robert says that implies more is just ridiculous.\u201d One thing is for certain, parents are going to be a lot more careful when it comes to their behavior around elves on the shelves. ]]>\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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