Stapleton Youth Coach Named Rockies New Manager

In a surprise move last week, the Colorado Rockies baseball club named Jim Miller its new manager. Coach Miller has most recently been coaching in the Stapleton youth sports league, Stapleton All Sports. “We are definitely saddened to see Coach Miller go,” Stapleton All Sports Director of Operations Chris Schmidt said in a statement. “We are excited for him and wish him the best in his new endeavors. His teams always performed well, and he did a great job of teaching kids the fundamentals, so I can see why the Rockies made this choice.”

Coach Miller is eager to start shaking things up with the Rockies. “First things first, I have to get to know the players,” said Miller. “So, we plan on having a pizza party, because I know kids love having pizza parties. Should be a lot of fun.” Miller also plans on trying some other things to, “keep the kids loose.” “If the kids play well, we plan to give each of them a stick of gum. But, this is meant to be a reward and not an everyday thing.”

Regarding strategy, Miller will stress the basics. “We have to understand the tag-up rule. If we don’t get that, we will get into all sorts of trouble with double, and sometimes even triple plays.” Furthermore, he wants the kids to have a “good eye” at the plate. “I will definitely stress to them to not swing at bad pitches. Nothing is more frustrating when kids swing at bad pitches.”

Some analysts have questioned the hiring of Miller, including ESPN’s Tim Kurkjian. “I am sure he is a great guy, and good with kids, but he has no experience managing a major league baseball team. Maybe that is what will help him in the end, but my gut tells me they could have hired a guy with more experience.”

Miller says he is used to the criticism. “I have dealt with emails from parents asking about why their child didn’t play more, or play a certain position. So, this is nothing new to me.” Miller and the Rockies begin spring training in early February.

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