Issue 154

Eastbridge Neighbors Losing Touch After Soopers Opening

Eastbridge Neighbors Losing Touch After Soopers Opening

The Eastbridge King Soopers has been open for a few months now, and overall, the “new” grocer is a big success. The store has more options in line with what the Stapleton consumer is looking for. The new Soopers has added more organic options, local produce, a salad and sushi bar, a Bistro, authentic Mexican […]

“Sky is Blue” Posting Causes Major Fight on Next Door

“Sky is Blue” Posting Causes Major Fight on Next Door

Last week Kelly Sturcke noticed a lot of vitriol coming from the popular neighborhood social media site “Next Door.” “It seemed like anything that was posted caused a fight,” said Sturcke. “Sometimes, it appears as if the post was meant to cause a fight. Maybe people are so lonely or bored they are posting things […]

Cold Weather Causes Stapleton Swap Servers to Crash

Cold Weather Causes Stapleton Swap Servers to Crash

Last weekend, Denver experienced some colder than usual weather for September with temperatures reaching the mid 40’s. There was rain in Denver, and snow in the mountains. Residents all over Stapleton used the cold weather as an excuse to lay around, watch football, let the kids play on their electrocnial devices and just take it […]

Stapleton Schools to Completely Phase Out Actual Events from Field Day

Stapleton Schools to Completely Phase Out Actual Events from Field Day

Stapleton Elementary Schools set a goal back in 2012 to rid field days of any sort of actual sport or competitions. “It was a really big objective for us,” said Bill Roberts PTA member Dawn Walsworth. “Kids were doing lots of running and jumping and throwing. Winners of events were even getting recognized. Things were […]

Stapleton Five Year Old Already Outgrowing New F*cking Pajamas

Stapleton Five Year Old Already Outgrowing New F*cking Pajamas

Stapleton five year old Beckett Shannon just turned five a month ago, yet that little f*cker is already outgrowing brand new pajamas his mom purchased for him. “It’s really frustrating,” said mom Nancy. “I mean, they are such cute pajamas, and they say ‘5’ on them. The first time he put them on, they fit […]

Stapleton Man Resents Friend No Longer Needing Babysitters

Stapleton Man Resents Friend No Longer Needing Babysitters

John Ubben and Duane Koellner have been Stapleton friends for 10 years. They go golfing, go to games, and have nights out with their wives. “We’ve spent a lot of time together over the years,” said Ubben. “We’re fairly like-minded, so we have a lot of fun and never have to worry about boring conversations.” […]

Residents Given Opportunity To Contribute To A Great Cause

Join fellow do-gooders – New Perspective Real Estate and The Stapletonion, in collecting food for the Food Bank of the Rockies and local school pantries. Hunger is a serious issue, and not just for Colorado’s stoners struggling with the munchies. Here are some creative ideas to donate to this worthy cause: Clear out all the […]